A Kenyan Burrito

My stove isn't working. Last week, no, two weeks ago I was boiling potatoes to make mashed potatoes, one of the only things I know how to make and when I came back downstairs to check on them the stove had turned off and I couldn't turn it back on. You have to press the button for the spark and then turn the knob. I did it about 50 times but I couldn't figure it out. When I talked to Natasha the other day on skype I asked her about it and she said that the gas used to light the stove must have run out and I need to take it to get it filled. Until I can get David to take me to the get it filled I have to eat out all the time. I always just go to Java House because they have some vegetarian food that it is pretty good and its a five minute walk away. Usually I just get the guacamole, cheese and tomato sandwich but tonight I decided to be adventurous and try a vegetarian burrito. It sounded pretty good and how can it be bad if it has rice, beans and cheese the standard burrito fare but boy was I wrong. The rice had the weirdest seasoning and the beans tasted like garbage. The guacamole and salsa were good but it would be pretty hard to mess that up. Luckily I had a mango juice that was so delicious to wash it down and cut the taste a little. I am in love with mango juice for some reason and I don't even like mangos. I think because regular mangos are to slippery, the texture is off putting. So just from friendly advice next time your in Nairobi skip the burritos. Rebecca said that said she is going to take me to a Mexican restaurant that she knows of and now I am scared. When I was walking back to my house the kids that live in the same court as me were telling me that there was a monkey a couple of minutes before I got there eating bananas on top of house number 7 and I missed it.

Distraction

On Monday I went to Kiambu to visit a school run by a CBO, Fofcom. Which was only about thirty minutes away from Nairobi. When I finally went to the school the children reacted in the craziest way. Some of the kids were standing with shaky knees, pointy and yelling. It was like people running from Godzilla, except I think they were excited. Some of the kids were jumping around and laughing. Seriously, I just got out of the car and started walking towards the teachers to meet them, you think with that reaction I was Justin Bieber or something. In the meeting as usual I just sat around half listening to the people in the meeting. My mind was wandering much more than usual during the meeting. I think it was because that morning I talked to my sister and she was telling me about my Grandpas funeral on Saturday and I was upset about missing it. During the meeting kids would slowly walk past the room pointing and staring at least they were a pleasant distraction. The school was at a primary school and I when I was out of the meeting and saying hi to all the kids and shaking there hands the older kids asked me what my name was which was nice. None of the kids in the other schools spoke to me in English so it was nice to actually feel like I communicated with them. I thought I was leaving so I said goodbye to everyone but I didnt actually leave for a while. I was standing by the car taking pictures and the kids noticed and they started jumping up and down, calling my name which they pronounced as Shalin and posing. It was so cute but I started feeling bad when I noticed some of the kids were poking their heads out of their classrooms in the middle of class. The longer I was there the more I wanted to hide, none of the kids could pay any attention while I was there. I felt guilty really I am singlehandedly being responsible for ruining their education, at least for that day at least. All in all this school definitely had the most exaggerated and excited reaction out of all the places that I went.

A weekend of surprises

This weekend turned out quite differently then I thought it would. Yesterday for the most of the day I just sat around trying to download America's Next Top Model on my laptop and eating cookies when suddenly I heard the door bell ring. I went to answer the door and three 20 something guys were standing there. I didn't recognize any at first but then I remembered Maseno who I met the first day I was here. He was with me when I went to that really gross Ethiopian restaurant when I first got here. He said he was on this side of town with his friends so he decided to stop by. We all chatted for a while and Maseno suggested that we hang out today and that he could just crash at the house tonight. In the morning we finished watching Romeo and Juliet (the one with Leonardo Dicaprio and one of the best soundtracks ever) which we had started the night before but didnt finish because he was to tired. When he picked Romeo and Juliet he said that he didn't know the story just that it was a romance. I never met anyone who didn't know the ending, I knew the ending before I saw the movie and I was like 7. At the end he was surprised that they both you know kill themselves but I think he missed the romantic tragic part of it. After the movie we started talking about Merchant of Venice the only Shakespeare play he's read and me made a comment about how Shylock is greedy and a villain and I could not let a comment like that pass. I calmly told him that Shylock was completely justified in his "revenge" and he should have gotten his pound of flesh from Antonio because he was racist and you can only put up with so much. We ended up arguing about it for like thirty minutes and I am happy to report that I won the argument. Shylock is again proven to be the only redeemable character in that play.

Soon after that we caught a Mutatu and headed into town. I was just blindly following him around but I still managed to have a good time. We got off near the University and walked to the Nairobi Arboretum which is this patch of forrest in the city. It was so green and beautiful and I saw some MONKEYS!!!!!! They were just walking around and I was so excited. There was even a baby one on the back of its mother. He must of thought I was so lame because it was all I could talk about for the rest of the day. Whenever there was even the slightest pause in the conversation I was like OH MY GOODNESS THOSE MONKEYS WERE GREAT!! They were though, they are the first wild animals I have ever seen besides the lizards I sometimes see wandering around the house and these camels I saw walking down the street. After that we walked around the university and we went to hang out in his dorm where he showed me the weirdest videos. He showed me this anti-Obama propaganda film and a video of some people being beaten and burned alive because they were believed to be witches or involved in the occult. It was weird and sad, I couldn't believe that I was watching that. Then after he fixed my phone ( I couldn't receive calls) we grabbed some lunch and I came back. I took the matatu back and I sat in the front with the driver and even though it is like the only seat that is roomy it is the worst place to be. I had a front seat view of all the cars and people he almost hit and I kept on pressing my foot on the ground like I was breaking. The matatu I was in was big like a bus and it just made it own lane when there was a little bit of traffic and he drove on the sidewalk to do it but I survived and that is the most important thing.

Embu

In total I went to went to five different centers. We went to the one in Isiolo, but also Maua, Chuka, Embu and Kerugoya. One that really stood out to me and I really enjoyed was Embu. We stayed two nights in Embu and the hotel was on one hand the nicest place we stayed all week and on the other the worst. It had the nicest garden, they were green with nice tables and servers that would come out and take your order. But the rooms were horrible, when we arrived our rooms weren't clean so we just went out to dinner. When we came back the floors were still dirty and the bathroom smelled moldy and the toilets leaked. I even had to take a cold shower in the morning because I couldn't get the shower to work. I later found out its the blue not red handle you need to turn to make it hot. So I ended up reading East of Eden in the gardens till the deafening sounds of crickets and bugs drove me in.

In Embu the school has to deal with more than one major issue. One thing that none of the other schools I visited had to deal with was people kept on breaking into their school and tearing the posters and breaking there things. When the would come back in the morning they would have to start again at square one. Also because the school was in a slum the level of poverty and cases of abuse were very high. The majority of the kids meals come from the lunch they are served at school. The teachers are having to deal with cases of abuse, getting the children to the hospital and contacting the authorities and would even chip in there own money to help. I couldn't believe the stories I was hearing it really is amazing to meet and be surrounded by people who care so much and are willing to do whatever they can for the well being of the children. After the teachers meeting I was talking to Ann one of the people who work with the CBO (Community Bases Organization) that supports the school when the children started to slowly come out of there rooms to say hello. As soon as I started saying hi to some of the kids they all started sticking out their hands for a handshake. They were calling me teacher and with so many children saying teacher, teacher it almost became a chant and it was so overwhelming and I dont know SUPER! Then they all started singing the ABC's and they had a little dance to go along with it. Rebecca said that when we get back to the office that I would be able to pick a school from one of the schools we visited and get to go back for a week or two. I thought before that now that I am in the office that I wouldn't get to have that experience and I think Embu is definetly on the top of that list.

Going to the field

Last week in the office they told me that I was going to be accompanying them on a trip to visit the actual ECD centers I have been hearing about for so long. When I was first told in my jet lag haze I was excited, as excited as I could be then but I began to get nervous. Rebecca told me that I need to make a list of all the things I think I will be responsible for on the trip so I knew it wasn't going to be just a fun seeing adorable kids kind of trip. I didn't know where to begin when creating my list but after a few hours and a lot of soul searching namely reading over my job description I was able to come up with a pretty decent list of seven things which I thought I would be able to do.

We all piled in the car on Sunday afternoon and then we hit the open road. It look a good four hours to get to Isiolo where we would be spending our first night and I spent that whole time staring out the window hoping to see a giraffe. I want to see a giraffe so bad it is almost driving me crazy. On a couple of the trips I went on earlier I was told I would see some giraffes but I never did and now that is all I can think about. When we got to the hotel I was nervous not knowing what to expect and as I approached the room I saw tons of bugs everywhere trying to get in but surprisingly there went that many in the actual room. We all dropped off our stuff and headed out to dinner. At the restaurant there was nothing vegetarian so I settled on some fries and a Fanta, a very nutritious dinner if I ever saw one. I didn't eat all of my fries, which kicked off a week of everyone making fun of me and nagging me about eating all the time.

The next morning we decided that Janet and I would go to the Iyap center while Rebecca and Pascal would go to Pastoralists since there were two centers that needed to be visited in Isiolo and there was no need for us to all go to all of them. In the initial meeting with the partners I just sat there silently taking notes only speaking when spoken to. I had things I wanted to say but I would always let the opportunity pass me by and let my nerves get in the way. When we finally went to the field to see the school I was excited. The kids came out to the car shaking our hands and saying hello. I went around and met all the teachers and the two volunteers they had from Germany. After I aimlessly walked around the center for awhile not knowing what to do with myself the meeting with the teachers started. I didnt say anything as usual but I did manage to mangle a couple of questions at the end. It was interesting to hear about all the problems that they were having on the field, like not having any toys, or they havent created a kitchen garden because I know that I am going to be apart of the team to help them try to work something out. After the teachers meeting I went to talk to the German girls and talking with them really made me feel horrible. After two weeks they already seemed so much more comfortable than I am and they were already speaking Kiswahili. David said they came up to him and they had a conversation in it. To top it all off, they served lunch which was this beans and rice mash that tasted so boring and monotonous that I could finish my plate and they practically licked theirs clean. Well after meeting them I have some fire put under me, I know it is possible. If two German girls one who had never been to Africa before and never worked with children can do it I can too!

Krakauer and Me

On my flight back to Nairobi earlier this week I spent the majority of my time reading. I read Into the Wild and Into Thin Air by Jon Krakauer. If you haven't read them read them, even though they are both tragic they sum up so perfectly what I want give to my experience here. TJ recommended them both to me when I told her I was thinking of climbing Mt.Kilamanjaro and after reading both books I want to do it more.In Into Thin Air, Krakauer recounts his experience climbing Mt. Everest in 1996. During the climb five people end up dying and the way he describes the real effort, anguish and pain it took out of everyone is spellbinding. When he talks about all the mistakes and oversights that lead to their deaths he doesn't make excuses for anyone not even himself in explaining what really happened. (Dont worry I didnt give anything away, it says people die on the back of the book.) I never really gave any thought to what climbing Mt. Everest or any mountain really actually intails but in order to climb it you have to dedicate two months out of your life! Once you are at base camp for the first couple weeks you are just making round trips to the camps higher up the mountain so you can slowly acclimate to the elevation. The elevation could kill you, oxygen is thin every single step is a huge effort and exhausting. When I was reading it I was completely transfixed and amazed. How can someone want to push themselves so hard? They get pushed beyond the limit not only physically but mentally as well. I just loved and respected how those people risked everything to test themselves in ways I cant even imagine. Seriously, Mt. Everest is 29,029 feet. Before Kraukaur landed in Nepal he was looking out the window in his plane and he was thinking about how he was going to end up climbing to an elevation that is as high as the plane he was in. After reading it you can see how everything no matter how small and insignificant you think it is can really add up on Everest everything is a balance. I wish that I can have some of those guts while I am here. To be able to push myself and go out of my comfort zone. Now I am slightly worried that Natasha is leaving and I am going to be by myself that I will get to comfortable and complacent, and being in Kenya will turn into Hayward 2.0.

In Into the Wild (they made a movie out of it which I haven't seen but want to) Krakauer tells the true story of Chris McCandless aka Alexander Supertramp who grew up in a wealthy D.C family and decided after graduating college to leave everything behind and travel across America. When I say everything I mean everything, he burns his money, abandons his car, cuts off all contact with family and starts hitchhiking. With nothing between the open road and himself he is able to really get out there and really experience nature with nothing filtering it and watering it down. He let nothing get in his way from experiencing everything truthfully. He wasn't looking for things to be easy he was looking for them to be honest and test him in such a way his true character was revealed. After reading it I immediately felt guilty for bringing back so much stuff to Kenya. When I was home I packed a huge suitcase full of clothes to bring back. I also brought back a bunch of book which I do not feel guilty about. People can come to Kenya, stay in some fancy hotel, not meet any of the people, see some animals and leave. Just spend a bunch of money but never experience what Kenya really has to offer and I don't want that. I want to actually get off the beaten path and see parts of Kenya that most people don't get to. I can't let fear get in the way.

Finally returned

I just arrived back in Nairobi three hours ago and I am exhausted. Not exhausted enough to sleep I found out when I climbed into bed as soon as I got to the house. I was worried as I waited for my luggage to come out from the luggage rail that I wouldn't recognize who was picking me up and I would be lost. Forever wandering the airport helplessly crying to myself. Luckily after I initially walked past the taxi driver sent for me I spotted him. He had one of those papers with my name on it and I felt fancy that someone was sent to pick me up. I always imagined only fancy business people or rich people get picked up with those signs, always in a limousine but I guess a few regular people get picked up with those too. The taxi driver Peter was very nice and he was telling me all the fun things I should do on the weekends. Like spending two days in Mombasa or going to Hell's Gate, which I definitely want to do. At Hell's Gate he said that you can get a bike and have a guide take you around to see animals and stuff.

I left on Monday at 5:30 and landed at like 8:50 Wednesday in Nairobi. It makes it seem like I was traveling for three days when in reality it was a little over 24 hours (which is still long)! I hated leaving even though I really wanted to get back. I felt like I was missing out on so much being back home. But in reality it was probably not that much, just staring at a computer screen for two weeks. I really cant believe that I am going to really miss the funeral. No matter what decision I made I feel like I would be getting the short end of the stick, denying some part of me. Do I take more time out of my trip to Kenya even though I can hear the ticking clock of time running out on my visit? Or do I stay for two and a half more weeks at home? in that time I won't do much else besides sitting at home with my Grandma, which is fine. I hope I made the right decision in coming back. There is nothing I can do about it now. I just hope I don't regret it to much when the 27th, the day of the funeral comes around.